Tuesday, May 29, 2012

It's more than enough for me. Alhamdulillah :)


Semalam, hari ape yee ? Hahaa, semua budak matrik 2011/2012 tahu. I can't describe how happy i was. Sebab ape yee ? Alhamdulillah, all praise to Allah. He gave me a wonderful result, which i knew it worth it with my efford. I love you Allah. You know how much i want this. You never give things i wanted badly instead you give me things i needed most. Kau memang Maha Bijaksana. Mengatur segala rezeki untuk hambaMu ni. Aku sangat bersyukur, this may be my ideal result. Not really excel and not really bad. Sederhana untuk aku. Tidak membuatkan aku bangga diri, dan tidak membuatkan aku rendah diri. YaAllah. surely You gave this as part of my fate, and i know all fates You have written is the best for us. And i believe in that. Alhamdulillah. Syukur Ya Robb. And You have given me such good friends in matrics, who really help me too much. As part of my successful result, they were the people behind it, who everyday support and gave encouragement in forcing me to study. Im happy with all this. You'll be forever in my mind, even i never say. InsyaAllah, one fine day, we'll meet up again.

Saturday, May 26, 2012

YaAllah sabarkan hati ini


Alhamdulillah, even dah lama sgt tk update blog ni. I wished i could, tapi since balik dari matrik, jadual terlalu padat dengan perkara-perkara yg menyumbat kepala otak ni. Seriously, maaf kepada sesiapa yg mungkin terasa dgn keadaan ni. You will do the same if you were in my place. For my friend in matrics, i don't know how am i going to explain this matter, but if you still hate me, yes you can. I don't really have any right to control your mind, your heart and also your feeling. It's up to you.

For god sake, i was busy in doing preparation for my upcoming bachelor studies. I don't know how to reduce this the worries. Taking classes near my place is the best way. I wished to pursue my studies in egypt. Ever heard it in any of my timeline life ? You should have. Yes, what course which i'll be taking there ? if i got any chances, im about to take pharmacist. Yes, some of my father's friends gave their hand. i would be the happiest person has ever live on this world. But it is an impossible thing ever getting through my mind. Crazy ? yes, because it is such a crazy thing to do. I did not take Bio and i dare to dream being such thing. But Allah knows what's the best for us. He knows im not deserve to be there. There's plenty of students who really deserve that. And im part of who does not. I shall leave the dream and built up new.

Days by days, my effort comes to the end. I looked at the KPT ( kementerian pengajian tinggi ) letter which i need to complete it before this end of may. My heart keep pushing me to fill up the form, but i really need to hold up my passion. " Jangan terlalu ikutkan nafsu sangat ". I always remember this quote. I read some references. Muhasabah diri secukupnya. By reflecting my life, i can see what i should do next. InsyaAllah i know Allah has given me the way to succeed. He knows better than i know. YaAllah i praise all to You.

Well, my biggest intention to go to egypt is to change. Changing is required in our daily life. Which makes you closer to better one. The situation in changing to a better one is not necessary influenced by the surrounding. But for me, the one who really easy to get influence by the surroundings, it should be a problem for me. Until this one fine day, i got text from UPU. They asked me to check back about the Medsi interview. I was shocked of my life to see my name was listed. Errgh, Alhamdulillah. It means, Allah has given the OTHER way for me. InsyaAllah this one is better than egypt and especially for the Piloting.

This morning, i went to the UiTM shah alam in faculty education and Intect students. This one for the Medsi interview. I never dreamed of being a teacher. But my parents love to see me be a teacher. So i go in the name of Allah *lailahaillallah* and for my parents dream. The interview was fine, we laughed in few minutes and more like talk show in there. Alhamdulillah Allah hasn't give much obstacle during the interview. I have no idea how on earth i could speak clearly and loudly. I know Allah has given me strength on getting through this. Praise to Allah infinitely.

And now, im trying to study about our religion, ISLAM of course. I read much, books i bought and some articles given by my class mate in matrics. He is always encouraging me in what i do. And i miss him so much. I want a wife *one only* which comes to me with the fate of Allah has written there, in lut mahfus. But im not a good man to her. That's why im not talking much to others nowadays. So please help me to overcome this conflict.

I can't really organizing this article. There's too much to be written here. The moment i popped up this page, i have plenty of things running in my mind. Ouh, there's a surprise i need to do since june is coming up. No more facebook, no more twitter and no more blogging. It such a waste of time. Indeed, i need strength in changing my self to a better one, so it's impossible to do with all these temptation. InsyaAllah.

This is the fate I meant before. Kalau dia jodoh anda, jauh manapun. InsyaAllah bersatu. 
Walau dalam apa juga cara. YaAllah, beruntunglah :')